A recent Pew Research report found that the percentage of U.S. adults who tied the knot by age 21 went from about 33 percent in 1980 to 6 percent in 2021. That’s a drastic change, and we’re seeing the societal implications already — fewer children and more lonely, unattached single young adults.
Young adults are putting off marriage for many reasons, which include wanting to establish their careers first and struggling to find their ideal partner.
While it’s true that God calls some people to marriage later in life (don’t despair, older singles!), most young people need to stop waiting and start considering marriage. Here are a few reasons why.
Waiting will not eliminate the cross of marriage.
Marriage can be a great joy, but it also comes with much suffering. This scares many young people away. They put off marriage in hopes that they’ll be more prepared down the road.
Truth is, you’ll never be fully ready for marriage. What good will waiting do? Chances are you’re suffering in your singleness right now. Just embrace the crosses and joys marriage brings!
Some of your “deal-breakers” are not a big deal.
Sure, you may have boxes you’re trying to check off. The two of you should share similar beliefs on faith, finances, family, and intimacy.
But does he have to make six figures and want to travel the world? Does she have to have blond hair and share all of your hobbies? Stop looking for the ideal spouse. Asking too much of your future partner will likely keep you single for too long.
Prayerfully examine your preferences and ask God to show you which you should let go of.
God probably won’t reveal your future spouse to you.
God’s not going to make flower petals rain from heaven when your future spouse walks into the room, nor will you receive an infallibly certain feeling that this person is meant for you.
You’ll likely meet several people who check your boxes and could make a good spouse. At this point, you prayerfully exercise a free choice. Once you marry that person, they become “the one,” and you embrace your life with them without looking back.
If you’re still waiting around for your spouse, stop! Start seeking them out now and don’t let the challenges of marriage scare you away.